I frequently get emails from pastors wondering how they can get their church from running like a machine to looking like a functional family. They wonder how to get from where they are to where they think my church is (I plan on writing more about that tomorrow, which is a whole other issue). I would call this process the deconstruction of the church. Be mindful that we’ve gotten to where we are today after 12 years and tons of continued disdain, ridicule, opposition and rejection. Anyway, here’s 10 suggestions I’ve quickly strung together for a start:
- Determine in your heart that you will do all things out of love, compassion and patience.
- Make sure this is what you want no matter what the cost (because often the cost is high).
- Are there any leaders or elders who are in agreement with you and will endure with you for the long haul?
- Start speaking honestly about what you are feeling and thinking. Begin with your closest group and move out to the whole community.
- Allow people to see you at your weakest. Then allow them to reveal themselves at their weakest.
- Let things die that require coercion, manipulation, begging or controlling others in order to live and continue on.
- Welcome diversity in belief, thought and lifestyle (they are already diverse, you are just welcoming its open expression).
- Change the teaching/ preaching time to a shorter teaching time with discussion following. This is scary at first, but you’ll get used to it and eventually prefer it. This levels the playing field really fast.
- Challenge only those who are judging, abusing, and controlling others.
- If people decide this is not for them, bless them as they go (because they will eventually go).
Maybe tomorrow I’ll post about why I find such requests on how to do this rather bizarre. It’s been a difficult road that I wouldn’t wish on anyone. Unless, of course, this is what they really, really want.
Contributions to nakedpastor are greatly appreciated.
David Hayward is a pastor artistically stripping to the essential.
#8 is a really interesting idea.
church is yucky.
The mother of all lists. I wonder where I would be now if I had of experienced this attitude.
Gene, #8 is interesting. I often wondered, long ago, why churches didn’t do this. I am sure many church attendees would just rather sit and listen, but I never understood why ministers thought I would like to sit, 1, 2, 3 hours a week and listen to their opinion. I would have learned so much more if we all could have discussed the topic.
Tradition, tradition!
#8 is critical – I find after that somewhere between 6 months to a year of regularly attending a church, I have learned whatever the priest/pastor knows. (And as a divinity school grad, much of it is simply regurgitation of what we were taught). But as a journalist, I NEVER get tired of hearing how the risen Christ is revealed in community.
“How To Deconstruct Your Church”
Focus on the person in the pew and not on Christ.
That ought to turn the whole thing into a self-help group, or navel gazing troupe.
God be praised! Change IS possible. My charismatic church, which some would describe as ‘happy-clappy’ though we do share our griefs, is undergoing some sort of revolution. They’re getting into contemplative prayer and the church leader is reading ‘The Cloud of Unknowing’! Crazy. The ‘New Monasticism’ movement is spreading further than I th ought it would.
Great list.
The Cloud of Unknowing is a fantastic read, Tiggy!
It’s fantastic that the leader of my church is reading it! Well, miracles do happen. He’s reading it whilst very tired and drinking some wine, according to Facebook – be interesting to see which takes him to a state of unknowing first.
thanks. it’s really helpful.
I’m from Malaysia, wonders of technology
# Let things die that require coercion, manipulation, begging or controlling others in order to live and continue on.
My favourite
My idealistic side says this shouldn’t be that hard.
Steve: If you can’t see Christ in this list, then you’re just not paying attention.
Brian,
I was answering the question, ‘How to deconstruct your church.’
(aside from David’s list)
Christ is in just about every church (or ought be), but many churches put the onus, the focus, the emphasis on the church members, rather than the forgiveness of sins in Christ Jesus.
The forgiveness of sins for Jesus sake does show up here now and then (which is a good thing).
‘Onus’ always sounds like a rude word to me – kind of a mix of onanism and anus.
I thought the forgiveness of sins was for OUR sake? Though I guess it was a win-win situation.
Tiggy,
Yeah it does sound a bit harsh, doesn’t it…
Yes it is a win-win!
At Jesus’ request (of the Father – “Father, forgive them…”) and for our salvation.
OH, I never connected that line with general forgiveness. I thought he was just referring to the people who crucified him and jeered at him etc. Interesting….
i’m liking #6………………..
I’m confused. Is this a 12 step type of Bible Study or about preaching? #’s 7 & 4 seem to preclude any need of Scripture as foundational for directing believers.
What a wonderful list! Especially #7…most churches just assume that their members believe in whatever their statement of faith says and if they don’t, a few classes will straighten them out. I very naively asked everyone to articulate what they believed, stating that I didn’t so much care what they believed, but that they could define it. Wow! what an experience. In any given group the God we come to worship has as many meanings as there are people. We assume we are talking about the same thing when we say Almighty God. Not so…everything from an anthropomorphic God of wrath to a Santa Claus/ fairy godmother type entity who lives in the clouds to a nebulous energy level will emerge when people become honest. And at that point, some people need to be shown how to change their image of the Divine, particularly those images formed before the age of 5. There is a vast difference between people who know about God through teaching and scripture, and those who go within and experience God.
Wow Joel, did it say it was either of those things? It’ s ‘How to Deconstruct your Church’.
6 & 9 would be great
Hey Joel and community,
To be fair, if scripture is to be the only inspiration for love and respect then there may be several blockages to honesty and understanding. Scripture can be thought of as a foundation for directing believers but also can be thought of as an introduction to the history of believing and directing believers.
Unless the absolute and authoritative truth came out of King James and his crew, as is held in belief by some:
http://eugenecho.wordpress.com/2009/10/14/pretty-much-everything-gets-burned-but-the-king-james-version/
Seriously, check it out. It’s fun in the “is this real?” kind of way.
Sorrt Tiggy, I don’t have your vantage point. I’m assuming a church is somehow connected to a public declaration of subjects closely or remotely related to the Christian faith. I suppose that doesn’t need to be the case. Deconstruction CAN include the absence of preaching, bible study, and all the other forms of worship traditionally connected to Western Christianity. Again that’s an assumption on my part. Deconstruction can also be just a basic definition. Or, as in my mind, connected to Jacques Derrida and imply the removal of a subject to its historical and original meaning and intent. In that case Tiggy, you are right again. Sorry for the confusion I’m a bit old fashioned.
Thank you for taking the risk and helping other pastors.
If seminaries and Bible colleges would allow information like this, I believe we would be able to fulfill the Great Commission.
Not too long ago, I would have called this list and Blog “heresy” because I was a
Fundamentalist “without” the soft chewy center!
Everybody pray for David because he has certainly made himself an open target for religionists.
Concerning #5. I went to a Pastor’s Conference, about 7,000 attended, and the conference leader spent most of the training sessions teaching pastors to always be the hero of the church.
If you look at the list, David doesn’t mention Bible Study – perhaps he doesn’t intend to deconstruct it, but you’d have to ask him. Point 8 relates to preaching. As a teacher, I’m aware that passive learning isn’t a good thing – people need to participate in order to claim it for their own lives and apply it.
You have the same ‘vantage point’ as me – w hat’s written on this page.
David: This is great. Time to write a book. With cartoons.
I agree with Doug.
I’ll buy the first ten copies!
Great list David. My comment would be with respect to
“…..how they can get their church from running like a machine to looking like a functional family…”
I’d have wonder if it’s more like a dysfunctional family
Tiggy, I get this tone from you that is patronizing and defensive. Everybody is coming from different faith experiences. If I wanted to join this church but you had to bottleneck my thoughts into your views, it would discourage me and perhaps other people from “traditional” churches to not participate. As I read #7 with the absence of God, Bible Study, etc, I would question who is included in that point if you have to be the referee.
I have no idea what you are talking about. You’ve clearly jumped to some erroneous conclusion. I go to a church where I’m very happy and it’s an Evangelical charismatic one. I have no plans to deconstruct it – that’s David’s thing. I’m not bored at all by the services and I usually find the sermons very moving. I go to a Bible Study group each week. You’re assuming I don’t go to a traditional church for some reason.
I have not even stated my views on anything, except the learning process, and I wouldn’t want to bottleneck anyone. Dont’ blame me because you didn’t read what David wrote properly. I haven’t even said that I agree with what he’s stated. I never set myself up as a referee – I just pointed out where David mentions the things you spoke of and made a short comment on teaching. And I suppose statements like ‘I don’t have your vantage point’ and ‘Sorry for the confusion, I’m a bit old-fashioned’ are not sarcastic and patronising?
If you have a problem with this deconstruction thing, talk to David, not me. I’m not the originator of it.
Okay Tiggy. Yes it was a bit sarcastic only because the tone of your answers, not just with me, give an an “intrusive” impression, one that implies a “know it all”. But I’m digressing again. Deconstruction has a lot to do with postmodernism, whether you know or believe it. Had it not been for “emergent” types I’d still be an agnostic, or at best a heretic! But that’s another digression. Having the openness to ask questions (cough.. #7) is supposed to be one of the points I raised above. Again, I didn’t know you were the determiner of what is or isn’t erroneous (#9?). But that’s okay too, you get the last word….
Well then I shall take it – t hank you, Joel. A lady SHOULD have the last word.
I thought you were, for some weird reason, thinking David’s list was some kind of outline for Bible Study or preaching. And I quote,
‘I’m confused. Is this a 12 step type of Bible Study or about preaching?’
If I sound a little pompous to you, that’s because I’m English. I have never been accused on here of being either patronising or defensive. I have nothing to defend.
Looking back at my posts on this thread, I find it hard to see which one might appear sarcastic – perhaps you mistake my genuine joy and enthusiasm for sarcasm.
No, I thought the “onus” remark was slightly rude, and dismissive of that persons remark. Associating words with different words that have no relation is one thing, but I gather you purposely chose “onanism” and “anus” to not only make YOUR point but disregard that persons. That’s an assumption, but in any case, it sets up the “mood” for your other remarks. English or not, that would make anyone second guess making any further remarks to you or a community.
I did think David was doing so re: the Bible Study or preaching. Isn’t that a valid question given he’s a Pastor? Doesn’t it logically follow?
Er it might logically follow if he hadn’t stated exactly what he was doing in large letters. Pastor’s do do other things apart from those two – lots of other things church-related and David does art stuff as well.
Yes, the onus remark was slightly rude, but nowhere near as risque as most of my whimsical comments. I think you haven’t been around here long or you’d know that. I did not disregard Steve’s remark at all as you can see from what I said afterwards, which was sincere. I was very pleased to learn of that interpretation because it was new to me and therefore had the ‘wow’ factor.
It ’set up the mood’ for my other remarks. Only in your head, I think. If anyone on here thought I was patronising, I’m sure they would have said so by now as I’ve been around a while. Sigh… if at first you don’t succeed, have a very large gin and tonic.
So,,,what’s church supposed to be, anyway? What is the objective? Is it to produce rock star type pastors? Grammy and Dove award musicians? To accumulate 1000’s of butts in the pews? Is it a place to watch a minister or a priest perform a ritual? What would happen if we came together once or twice a week with only the words of Jesus to guide us? I don’t think the apostles were a very polished group, and I don’t think Jesus used a stopwatch so he wouldn’t go over the time allotted. Did the apostles call an emergency board meeting because the passing of the peace took 7 min two Sundays in a row rather than the allotted 5? Did they censure Jesus because he wore a seamless garment? Did they refuse to talk to Peter because he used some coarse language?Seems to me, even when He spoke to the multitudes, they could still ask questions. It seems that He taught about how to live a better life…how to enter the spiritual…how to be a loving presence in the community. Where did we get the idea that we have to have a 3 ring circus to have church? Yes, as people come, they bring their best gifts, but those are a by product, not the main event. Too much emphasis is being put into numbers…how many made the altar call…how many in attendance. Focusing on whatever the day brings…recognizing that God speaks through people other than the pastor…knowing that a song sung from the heart is better than a polished performance…letting church just “be” rather than trying to write the Holy Spirit’s agenda for it…it’s a giant step in the right direction.
preacherlady brought up an interesting point in her first comment (the second was good too!) about instructing youths.
David, how do you instruct children and youth at your church? I imagine you do not indoctrinate them! What does Christian formation look like in the congregation you serve?
Dave: We instruct our children and youth. We try to find and use material that tells the bible stories in an open and non-dogmatic manner and that gives the child freedom and space to explore and discover.