My faith, or the feeling of my beliefs, is something I built. Some might argue I inherited or it was gifted to me. Nevertheless, I took what I was given and made something of it. My faith.
Then, I started to watch it erode. Just like a sandcastle in the tide. It started a long time ago in seminary.You can read all about my journey in my book Questions are the Answer. I fought against it for a long time. But then I realized it was hopeless to resist it. I refused to revert back to simpler times because I did want to evolve. And I did. And I am. I just watch it happen. Although I’m intentionally involved. I’ve gradually come to the point where I no longer use the words “faith” or “belief” to describe my inner life.
The terror I experienced when this first started, and then when it climaxed at its highest intensity, was very real. I understand what you’re going through. It is absolutely terrifying. But I want to assure you that you can make it. Like I’ve said before, I have peace of mind now… something I sought for decades and which eluded me but is now mine. Grief is real, and it is necessary to process this. But I am certain we can move on to a peaceful acceptance. I know I have!
If you need a safe place to do this along with others who understand and listen well, check out The Lasting Supper!