nakedpastor

When I’m going through times of incredible doubt about my vocation; when I’m experiencing a dramatic shift in beliefs; when I my theology is crashing and burning; when I wonder if I took a wrong turn; when I acknowledge my life is more than half over and what have I accomplished; when confusion is the air I breathe; when my mountains fall into the sea; and when I realize that I will use the internet, movies, tv, alcohol, tobacco, or anything in all of creation as a sedative against all my anguish… I realize I have people to love and be loved by. This is my daughter Casile going out to a prom, and her mom, my beautiful and wise wife, Lisa. And there are the beautiful flowers. In the background is the majestic Kennebecasis River that we live on. Sometimes it is only love and beauty that holds me together.

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Lisa and I, the babe in the pic, have been married 29 years today. No small feat. Watched “Fireproof” last night. Some good advice for marriage or any relationship for that matter. Except for all the American Western born-again Christianity it’s thoroughly soaked in. Can’t help but guess that the title “Fireproof” is loaded with significance: fireproof your marriage from burning to the ground by intentionally loving one another well; and fireproof your marriage by accepting Jesus Christ as your own personal Lord and Savior or you’re going to burn in Hell, you and your spouse!</br>
<br>The other night at homegroup someone said, “Marriages only survive with Jesus at the center!” Someone pointed out that everyone in the room, except for me, have been divorced. All 10! Plus there were a couple of people who lost loved ones to suicide. All while Jesus was there. Lisa and I have no doubt that God has been with us in our relationship. But we are also painfully aware that either of us, at any time, could walk our separate ways and God wouldn’t stop it. It’s a myth I was fed ever since I was in the church that if Jesus is at the center then life will be perfect. There is no difference in the statistics between believers and non-believers in the realm of marriage, illness, wealth, happiness, or any other category. Which is why Calvin correctly states:

The believer must not expect Heaven on earth or hope to reap the fruit of victory or to live in rest. Here he lives in need, imperfection and trouble, and there is externally no difference between believers and heathen. Yet the life which is promised is real and no shadow. It is in the Christian like the life of trees in winter, hidden, but waiting to show itself in the fulfillment of time. Our life is elsewhere; it is now hidden, but it will be revealed to us at the coming of the Redeemer.

We celebrate our 29th anniversary today. And it has taken us a lot of hard work. This hard work has its rewards. But we’re not going to fool ourselves into thinking that it succeeds because of a secret spiritual formula. Sorry for the mythbusting. And thanks for the congratulations! We’re happy.

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I had a dream a few years ago where I saw this picture. Strong and ambitious men climbed incessantly to the top of the pyramid, the top of the heap, where they celebrated their success. But it was only temporary, because the hand of God inevitably swung through and wiped out those at the top. However, the ambitious struggle to the top wasn’t stopped, and the strong men again and again endeavored to climb to the top, initiating the same process over and over again.

I’m submitting this to this week’s Illustration Friday under the theme “Heirarchy”.

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Have you heard the joke about the man who came to church for the first time? She was a beautiful church, and he became very attracted to her. She had everything he was looking for. They started seeing each other on a regular basis. After a while, he and the church decided to consummate their relationship. One night the man stripped down to his bare necessities and waited for the church to join him. He watched with excitement as she undressed in front of him. First, she took off her refined music and put it away in the drawer. Then, she took off its various small group meetings and put them away in the drawer too. Then, she took off her motivational messages and put them in the drawer. She even took off her mission statement and statement of faith and put them in the drawer. He looked in amazement as she continued. She took off her coffee and cookies and put them in the drawer. Then she took off her public image of success and influence and put that in the drawer. Finally, she took off her fine building and accessories and put them in the drawer. There she stood, naked before him, very plain and ordinary. He looked at her. He looked at the drawer. Then he said, “I don’t know whether to stay here or get in that drawer!”

When new people come to our community, I always feel it is like dating. Let’s admit it: they’re shopping. I have to acknowledge that we are on trial. It is so tempting to try to control our image. It is so tempting to worry about what if one of my people swears in frustration in homegroup… which sometimes happens. What if they discover that everybody in my homegroup is have been divorced except me? What if they find out many of us drink and some of us smoke? It is so tempting to put our best face forward. But I resist those temptations as much as possible. They might as well find out sooner than later what we are like. And I say “we”, because it is about the people. If they don’t like the music or the teaching style or whatever, there’s nothing that can be done about that. It’s finally about us. Will they quickly discover that this is about friendship, relationship and community rather than all the extras? Will they discover that they can love and be loved here before the details of how we do things is discerned or before they discover the diversity of belief and lifestyle that is represented here? Will they recognize, ultimately, that this is a place where they can be free to discover their own faith and explore how to live it uniquely before God in this world?

The fine art photograph is taken by my friend Mark Hemmings.

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I’m submitting this painting that I took all day yesterday to paint to Illustration Friday under the theme “Theater”. I call it “Clear Northern Night”, but I’m entering it because, I kid you not, my favorite theater is the night sky. It’s acrylic and ink on gallery wrapped canvas: 2′x3′… 24″x36″ (approx. 61cm x 92cm). I’m going to need to get my professional photographer friend Mark Hemmings to photograph this because I just can’t seem to capture the vibrancy of the reds. It’s actually for sale for $599 in my online Etsy gallery.

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Check out my tees HERE. I’m growing my inventory all the time. And check out my art HERE.

I read somewhere recently that physicists believe that 60% of the universe is made up of dark matter. Some even suggest an even greater percentage if you add the dark energy. The same is true of the human psyche. It is pretty much agreed among psychoanalysts that the greatest percentage of the human psyche is subconscious (if you are Freudian) or unconscious (if you are Jungian). Jung spent a great deal of time studying and writing about the Shadow, that dark, mysterious and important component of the human makeup. It’s like an electric current: you need both the positive and the negative for power. All positive with no negative is harmless and useless. Good and evil, darkness and light and their relation is a profound mystery that we would be wise to investigate.

George Grant, the great Canadian philosopher, wrote:

Philosophy is for those who have moved beyond any simple certainty. It is for those who have come face to face with the mystery of existence and who have seen how profound a mystery it is. Philosophy is the attempt to fathom that profundity- that is, to find the wisdom which will enable us to live as we ought.

Now the sense of mystery arises for people in two ways; first from just plain wonder at the world around them, and secondly from the anguish of their own lives.

I am suspicious of anything that doesn’t have the undercurrent of anguish. The hyper-faith positive thinkers ring false because of the noticeable absence of the reality of suffering and evil that personally touches our lives. This is one of the things that is very difficult to teach in our community. Some people feel the need to believe and feel positively about everything all the time. To give them permission to be honest about the perpetual pain in their lives, to me, is a profoundly important step on their way to becoming fully human.

The fine art photograph with the beautiful contrast of darkness and light, is the creation of my friend Howard Nowlan.

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Check out my tees HERE. I’m growing my inventory all the time. And check out my art HERE.

I wasn’t shocked, but I was a little bewildered by the news this morning that United Airlines is going to charge overweight people double for their tickets. Here’s the guideline:

Under the rules outlined by United, passengers who are unable to fit into a single seat in the ticketed cabin; are unable to properly buckle the seatbelt using a single seatbelt extender; and/or are unable to put the seat’s armrests down when seated will be denied boarding unless they purchase an extra seat.

Apparently Americans have grown approximately 25 pounds since the 1960’s. Seat designs of today are basically the same as the 60’s. Many argue that the problem isn’t the size of the passenger but the size of the seat. I agree. Even though I’m pretty much where I “should” be weight-wise, I am over six feet tall and I never have enough room on a plane. My knees inevitably are shoved into the seat in front of me even before it is reclined! I have to spread my legs and sprawl into the space of my neighbors. Even my 35 inch arms have difficulty finding a place to rest. We are bigger. We are taller. We can discuss all the medical ethics involved because obesity increases health care and medical expenses, etc. But I want to talk about something else.

Our idea of what a body should look like is changing. This is not news. Look at artistic nudes down through the centuries and the body shapes are amazingly diverse. Even culturally, what is regarded as a beautiful body varies greatly. We know what the west believes is a beautiful body. Just look at the covers of our magazines or the stars of our movies. But it is more than just appearances. Now, health is associated with weight. So now, not only is what we consider beautiful pleasant to the eye, but necessary for health.

Let’s take, for example, Angelina Jolie. I choose her not because I personally think she is the hottest, but because apparently she is the conglomeration of all that is believed to be visibly perfect in a woman. She is considered by some of my friends, male and female, to be the pinnacle of what feminine beauty looks like. Then, let’s say that her figure is what the pinnacle of feminine health looks like. If a woman worked out as hard as she does for hours a day with a personal trainer and ate as she does, etc., then a woman would attain to roughly that kind of physical health and beauty. So now you have what is considered beautiful, plus what is considered healthy, and the two meld together. Soon, based on what I perceive is happening in such incidents as United Airline’s announcement, health and therefore ultimately beauty will be legislated.

We are becoming more and more tyrannical. It is the tyranny of health and beauty. It is the tyranny of consensus. It is the tyranny of popular. It is the tyranny of homogeneity. It is the tyranny of opinion substantiated by science. Science proves that a healthy body looks like so, and what happens to be so is what is already considered by popular opinion to be beautiful. Overweight people will be increasingly marginalized, ridiculed and finally persecuted. Same with those considered ugly. The whole Susan Boyle incident should embarrass us back to some kind of philosophical restructuring of our values, should it not? An ugly person with a voice? A miracle! She’s a freak, not only because she’s ugly, but because she’s ugly AND she can sing!

There must be communities that live contrary to this tyranny. We must protest against this by encouraging, nurturing and applauding diversity in every facet of human life and expression.

The painting is Lucian Freud’s “Benefits Supervisor Sleeping” that sold last year for $33 million… the highest fetched for any living artist.

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