One of the things I’ve struggled with ever since I was a young man was my complete devotion to the bible. When I first became a Christian at 16 years of age, a young man, a school teacher, personally took me under his wing and mentored me in the fine art of devotional bible study. I still have my first parallel bible extensively marked and colored and coded with my writing in the margins, as pictured here. It is a wonder to look at. One can’t help noticing that I favored the Living Bible. I’ll be forever thankful for Bruce, his care for me, as well as his intense passion for the bible that I inherited and which continues to this day.
Later in my B.A. and then into my masters degrees, I focused on the bible. I took a few years of Hebrew, several years of Greek, and even Aramaic. While at College, I took as many courses as I could with Dr. Ben Aker. I’ll never forget his Romans course, that enflamed my mind with an even deeper commitment to the bible. Then I was under the tutelage of Gordon Fee while at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, probably the leading New Testament textual critic of his day. My zeal for the bible was intense and long-lasting. But I would call my attitude toward the bible fundamentalist.
Then some questions wormed their way into my well-fortified hermeneutic. I remember in seminary reading a small little book titled The Silence of Jesus: The Authentic Voice of the Historical Man, by James Breech. He took a Nietzschean approach to the sayings of Jesus. This little book not only pulled the rug out from under my feet, but took the floor with it. I remember feeling the enormous fear of free-falling into the dark abyss of uncertainty concerning the bible. It totally shook me. I was terrified. My personal terror even scared Lisa.
These little worms nested in my mind, never to leave. I didn’t know how to deal with it. Every once in a while I’d revert to my fundamentalist attitude. But I would struggle to reconcile this with what I felt about God and truth. Even though the bible and my interpretation of it was very literal, I was also open to a far less literal application of it. It was like I was a fundamentalist in my mind, but a liberal in my heart. I then would go down the never-ending road of which scriptures were to be taken literally and which ones to be taken metaphorically; which scriptures were timeless and which ones were ad hoc; which scriptures were wrong and which ones were right. If I could just get to the original manuscript’s intention for meaning, then I would find peace. But this, I discovered, was just a more liberal expression of a fundamentalist approach to the bible.
Finally, when I had my dream and started trying to articulate it in such expressions as the Z-Theory (type “z-theory” in the search box and read away), it made sense. I realized that the bible is a work of art. This is how I approach it now: as an artistic expression of Truth. It isn’t meant to be taken literally, or converted into a book of rules, or read as an historical document. Although all these things find expression in the bible, it is first and foremost a beautifully inspired work of art. Having the shackles of fundamentalism finally drop from my mind, it has brought a peaceful reconciliation between my brain and my heart. I’m still grateful for the years of study in the details of the bible. For now I can enjoy the picture.
Contributions to nakedpastor are greatly appreciated.
David Hayward is a pastor artistically stripping to the essential.
It’s inspiring how your love for the Bible comes through when you write about the start of your Christian journey and now at where you are now. From what you write your love for the Bible is obviously a real gift, and as with all good gifts, one that is able to do good things for other people too.
You must have heard the phrase “divinely inspired and not divinely informed”.
Very good writing. Thank you.
I love this. I am having a hard time with the bible lately. Do I take it literally? Do I follow all the rules? This helped me just enjoy what is written and quite analysizing it so much.
32 years ago I began to study scripture and for most of that time I’ve been struggling with the fundamentalist view I was taught from (I was taught by old line Pentacostals) as opposed to what I knew…that the bible was made up of different types of literature…that apocalyptic literature leans heavily on metaphor, and it was almost as if it were two people studying the scriptures. The fundamentalist view gave me the surety I needed at the time and it was from this viewpoint I taught and studied. All the while I was seeing things that expanded upon what I was reading, but nothing was shaking my fundamentalist view. One was Alice, the minister, and the other the intellectually and spiritually curious Alice. And then about 10 years ago, things began to change and I began to experience things that weren’t quite lining up with what I knew, and I began to read the writings of some of the mystics and then the intellectual rug was pulled out from under me…partly by reading some of Bishop Spong’s stuff and partly by just knowing and discussing with a friend. But once I was able to connect some dots, and disconnect a lot more of them, I have a totally different view of scripture, the different levels at which it can be read. The biggest plus to all of this has been a deeper understanding of Jesus, as the Christ, and of the Christ in us. This is, of course, why this blog has been a daily habit since your first post on the Z theory. Its good to find a kindred spirit along with a few others who are also on the same path..Actually, we’re all on the same path and if you follow the teachings of Jesus, as opposed to the religion about Jesus, long enough,you end up in the place where you have to question all you thought you knew, in order to learn all you need to know at this period in your life.
Well I know this is my “Lutheran” presupposition but I see the Bible as sacrament instead of a literalistic reading for all the answers just what conveys the grace of God-person of Christ-Living Word of God! I see that some Catholic and Protestants see it that way as well.:
http://www.spu.edu/depts/uc/response/spring2k7/features/multifaceted-bible5.asp
http://www.ignatiusinsight.com/features2005/kreeft_readbible1_jun05.asp
http://books.google.com/books?id=V_JZ_w2G4RoC&pg=PA31&lpg=PA31&dq=bible+as+sacrament&source=bl&ots=Es-mjIaA3R&sig=bqfEPUfD9vHmL9KZB1PXcl5MIp0&hl=en&ei=rpkMS57FCpGVtgeDwIjZAg&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=2&ved=0CAsQ6AEwATgK#v=onepage&q=bible%20as%20sacrament&f=false
“It isn’t meant to be taken literally, or converted into a book of rules, or read as an historical document. Although all these things find expression in the bible, it is first and foremost a beautifully inspired work of art.”
I agree with the second statement, but I think it’s also meant to be taken literally where it’s meant to be taken literally, read as a historical document where it documents history, and some parts of it are by definition about rules, but I agree completely that it’s not “a book of rules,” even though strictly speaking it is, since there are rules in it. Okay, I think I even lost myself in there…
How you come to a book determines what you make of it.
I agree there are beautiful parts in the King James Version. But I don’t find the Old Testament horrors or Jesus talking about hell to be beautiful.
for me, some of it is to be taken literally, and some is to be taken allegorically, but there is truth in both. i don’t mean a personal truth, but an absolute. the best way i have found to cope is that the closer you get to the “center” (matthew chapter 1) the more literal it can be, even if christ’s stories are allegories and parables; and the more i get to the edges (genesis and revelation), the more it gets into non-literal areas, where the bible itself is allegory and not a literal Man who talks in allegory — i fully do not expect a four headed monster or what have you to sprout from the sea, godzilla like, and bring about armageddon. although i have discovered that maybe god has enough of a snarky sense of humor to make it happen that way just to mess with fundies.
i discovered that there could be a difference between a truth and an absolute, and i discovered that difference doesn’t have to be “moral relativism.” sometimes i don’t know where the line is, and that is where i have had to learn faith. faith is sometimes terrifying for me, and i am sure others. i like when people are honest about their fear and their faith, how their fear can be stronger than their fatih sometimes. i also am still trying to live in a world where there are things i cannot comprehend, and there are things i simply am not allowed to know on this side of the silence. i want proofs, facts, and absolutes, and it seems to me that from what i can tell, god likes bridging impossible paradoxes and grey areas and infinity and eternity, and all sorts of things “too wonderful for me to comprehend.”
i can handle that god is absolutely sovereign. it is more difficult and evidence of my flaws, that i find it difficult to handle the absolute goodness and absolute love of god, that god doesn’t just love, but he is love — it is often hard to stop believing in, and start believing god.
i still have my fears, but i fall in love with god, and i do so because of the bible, which is many things, a beautiful, sublime work of art. like all great art, it challenges me to the core. and at the very core of the bible, i try not to forget that it’s not about a book, but about Christ, a literal Christ who walked this earth.
still, i’m thrilled and scared, yet somehow at peace and in anticipation. there is something in me that is beyond me, that much i can deduce. and that something is stirred when i study the bible about christ.
enough blabber, jesus was evidently terrified the night before his crucifixion, so perhaps it’s ok if i am scared too. and i try to still walk forward in faith.