nakedpastor
graffiti artist on the walls of religion

Friends at the End of the Day

Written on October 24, 2007 in art, thought
20 Comments - Leave a comment!

lexmarkaioscan875.jpgA friend sent me a small note that said, among other things, “Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts” (2 Timothy 2:22). It meant a lot to me, especially today, and I’ll tell you why.

People have left our community. Again. And I think more will leave. It’s hard to take. I don’t resent them. I’m not angry. People are free to choose what they want. I don’t imagine I have everything everybody needs. But when new people come (and I hope new ones will) I always feel a little insecure. People are often drawn to the strong sense of community and the potential for friendship. Our music is passionate. People pray. The teaching, shared by many, is good and solid. Plus we have great parties. But I always wonder how long it’s going to take new people to realize that there is nothing else. What you see is what you get. Period!

I remember quite a while ago someone complaining to me about our community and about the way I do leadership. Well, mainly the fact that I don’t do leadership. I’m not a strong leader. The people of the community are great. There is authenticity. Worship’s great. Teaching’s great. But let’s get a vision! We need a purpose! Let’s organize and DO something! I asked this woman why it wasn’t enough that we had worship, fellowship, teaching, prayer, and that people were helping others. She was drawn by all these things. She loved the authenticity, how real people were, how honest and sincere, how radical and rebellious against the machine they were. But she wanted more. She wanted the slick glamour that other churches have with all their programs and outreaches and ministries and appearance of health. I said that I didn’t think that you could have both. It’s one or the other. If you want genuine and authentic community, I think you have to neglect the pursuit of success. If you want success, you have to neglect authenticity. It’s form or substance. Choose one. She chose. She left.

It is happening again and will happen again. I shared this with a friend this morning and he said that he had been praying for me and felt that there was a cross in my future. Lovely! But he also said that he prayed that God would give me companions for the journey. Sometimes I wonder if, like this painting I painted yesterday, it might come down to just me and a few friends at the end of the day. I hope not. I hope there will be a crowd. But I won’t bet on it.

20 Comments - Leave a comment!
  • Chris

    Is this what Jesus meant when He said,”Narrow is the Way”? I think so……..

    Love the painting! The one in front seems to have paused for a moment to look up. Abandoning “the goal” and rejoicing in the moment. No vision. Just beauty. Good work, David.

  • http://barrensense.blogspot.com/ barrenmind

    Do not forget that you have friends online.

    Count me in!

  • http://www.crackedvirtue.com Brianmpei

    “…the slick glamour…” Too funny. Sometimes I don’t know how to take the things you right and feel like the little I know you is enough to know you don’t really mean some things the way I read them. In Acts 6 the church leaders started a feeding program. You can call it whatever you want but it was an organized program to make sure that the distribution of food was getting to the most easily overlooked. I don’t know, I guess I’m just saying that I don’t think wanting to organize together to do something collectively that you can’t do on your own is all that slick or glamourous or it least not necessarily.

    But maybe your conversation with this woman went something like this:
    Her: NP, I’m leaving.
    NP: Why?
    Her: I long for the slick glamour of programs…
    NP: Oh.
    Her: Give me Power Point presentations or I’ll die…
    NP: Um, uh, o.k., bye.

  • http://asbojesus.wordpress.com jonbirch

    my church community’s weeny. it’s only a few it seems who don’t like being bossed about by programmes and schemes and visions etc… most find comfort in it.
    i guess it’s about finding peace where you are, wherever that may be, however many in your congregation.

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  • http://nakedpastor.com nakedpastor

    brian: i wouldn’t call feeding the poor glamorous either

  • Rusty

    Hey, after a mass exit of people even Jesus asked his disciples if they would leave him… So I would say you are in good company. Many church “attenders” in America think they know what they want, but they don’t.. Even those that leave you for a more structured program will complain after a while at the “structured church with all it’s progams”. Once “church attenders” learn that it is only Jesus that satisfies, then they are on their way to becoming disciples of Christ instead of “attenders of churches”. Keep painting, keep giving people room to grow and share, no matter if a few or many are with you.. Praying for you. I have pastored in the “machine” as you call it and pastor outside the machine now.. It isn’t so much the process as the product. Sell process “structured or not” over the product “Jesus and his grace” and you have a mess. It’s one reason why you find so many weak Christians (church attenders) in structured churches because they push the process, not Christ.. But I will tell you I have seen the same in open communities where they feel as if their openess is the answer over structure. Without Christ none of them work.

  • Rusty

    P.S. By the way.. Love your art!

  • sarah

    Love you David.

    Praying for you.

    Sarah x

  • http://myfaithdefined.blogspot.com Nate Peres

    “I said that I didn’t think that you could have both. It’s one or the other. If you want genuine and authentic community, I think you have to neglect the pursuit of success. If you want success, you have to neglect authenticity. It’s form or substance.”

    That statement is not true.

    If this person you spoke with was feeling led of God to do something. Then she should have done it. You will say, “she did, she left.”

    Not what I meant.

    What I mean, is allow her to talk with others of your community, if they are like minded, then they could start, let’s say, a prison ministry. She can have her ministry, but it does not have to be non-authentic. If I felt led to go to prison to visit or minister or whatever. I would be able to do it with such honesty, that the authenticity would show through. If people feel led to do something, it may be from the Lord, and you should not stifle that. Denial to action, is another form of behavior control.

    If she were seeking to change the charter of the place. A resounding NO, was then the right answer.

  • http://www.brianmpei.wordpress Brianmpei

    Hey, at least it was slick glamour. A few months ago one of my best friends left the church because we weren’t spiritual enough. Seriously depressing. Hoping it turns out not to be true.

  • http://nakedpastor.com nakedpastor

    Well, if I believed God could be found and worshiped out in the wilderness alone, that’s where I’d be. But I’ve been convinced that there is something about the gathering together, the assembly, that can’t be had in nature. Which is why I’m a pastor, partially.

  • http://www.jeanierhoades.com wholehearteddevotion

    Aaaaarrrrgghhhhh…I know this pain. I do. It is a loss. You pour into some one and pastor them and “worship with them in the sanctuary” and then they leave. And then next Sunday morning you welcome the guests as warmly and authentically as you can-knowing they have the potential to rip your heart to shreds, too.

    I love Rusty’s comment because it is true. Inside the slick well-marketed organizations, or in the small house church – people will have opinions and become dissatisfied and move on, but as pastor – you must remain true to what Jesus Christ has called you to. You are no more bound to be driven by purpose than Rick Warren is to throw as many parties and hang out with the people you do regularly.

    But you are both accountable to what Christ calls you to.

    By the time you are finally truly dying on your cross to self (and really beginning to reflect His image), there will be as few people really there for you as there was for Jesus- as there will be for Billy Graham or Rick Warren or Joel Osteen. But what you’ve been faithful and obediant in will shine just as brightly. And you’ll be known in heaven.

  • http://jer110.blogspot.com In the Den

    My wife and I helped (some might say killed) a church earlier this year. We had the same feelings. I hope it’s a comfort to know that people have been where you are, but I’m afraid I don’t have any good news beyond that.

    Also, I love the painting.

  • http://www.dorseymarshall.com dorsey

    Y’know, I was reminded of Israel’s demand for a king as I read this. Why are we so eager to have an accomplishment that we point to? Why must we require tangibles? Is it a lack of faith? It seems so.

    Why is it that, for some people, just abiding isn’t enough?

  • Rusty

    dorsey, well said. “Why is it that, for some people, just abiding isn’t enough?”. I would say it is more than just “some” people. In my walk it is many people. Most of what the church has picked up, at least in my life time, is “corporate or business” methodology. Setting goals of which only the addition of money, people, or buildings become success. No matter if they are disciples of Christ, no matter if they don’t know how to abide in Christ, no matter if they understand the mercy of God, the question becomes, “how many did you have at church on Sunday?”. Abiding doesn’t even seem to come into the picture. Seems to me that most people live in the mistakes of the past or the goals of the future, and nothing of today… Sad existance not knowing how to “relax”, or “abide” in Christ each day.. I ought to know I have spent much of my life doing that and only recently (last few years) have really been asking God for help in resting in him daily. Christ knew what he was saying when he said, “take no thought for tomorrow, for tomorrow will take care of itself”.

  • bj

    maybe the crowd will gather at your cross?

  • http://craftycurate.blogs.com Richard L

    No doubt, it’s a pickle.

    The “community first” approach that allows things to evolve, and the “purpose driven” approach, or whatever we want to call it.

    I think of the Carthusian monks on a TV documentary who described their life or prayer as “a symbolic presence” but whose growth rate was 0%.

    How can we pursue a life of prayer and service, of creativity and intercession, and of immersing ourselves in the vast and dangerous story which is the Bible, and just unhook from the “church growth AGENDA”? Or is that relinquishing a responsibility?

    I think many churches have taken the Great Commission into their own hands and become so “intentional” that they have lost genuine community. Do we REALLY trust that our mission is the “Missio Dei” or have we too often taken the ball and run with it beyond the leading of the Spirit?

    Also, I don’t like the word “driven” in “purpose driven” … why not the “purpose-led” church, or the “compassion-led” church, or the “prayer-led” church?

  • Chris

    “Well, if I believed God could be found and worshiped out in the wilderness alone, that’s where I’d be. But I’ve been convinced that there is something about the gathering together, the assembly, that can’t be had in nature.”

    Very true. However, there is something to be said about the solitude of the wilderness and being alone with God that even Jesus found useful. I think the key is remembering to return and do the work appointed to you.

  • http://www.abundant-blessings.com Abundant Blessings

    About a year ago, a few of us in our church were discussing dwindling numbers. It was realized that it was being approached all wrong. They had been going after the numbers instead of going out and doing the work of God (and let the numbers follow as a result). I think the majority of churches have this backwards.

    I tend to agree with Nate’s suggestion above; that if some members feel called to do some outreach, etc., why not encourage them to do so? How do you think this particular woman would have reacted to that? Or would she wait for someone to offer the program in a nicely marketed package?

    I have also found that some people will ask for things like this, and when the church tries to start it up, they end up leaving anyway over something else.